Dealing with critics at work

Source: McLeod & more

When you start your first work email with ‘Goof morning…’ you know it’s going to be one of those days. But it takes a conscious effort to have the right attitude. You may find yourself working at an establishment where some colleagues try to put you down, try to set you up to fail or criticize your work. You have a choice to let them defeat you or your can decide not to let them invade your positive mindset. But how do you do that?

I’ll tell you one thing – it’s not easy. You could try to ignore them. But that’s difficult if you have to work closely with them. While I’m a believer of choosing my battles, I also encourage people to be prepared with appropriate responses to criticism. You see, keeping quiet is not a solution because it welcomes further criticism. Aggressive retort could also have bigger consequences that may result in intervention by your human resources department. You want to exhibit the right attitude not the fight attitude. There are responses that are well seasoned and would let the critics reevaluate their tactics.

You want to exhibit the right attitude not the fight attitude.

Your responses should never be personal or emotional. Keep it professional and relevant to the job. If the criticism you receive is not based on your job but your character, take a step back to reflect. Get the opinion of a trusted colleague or have a one-to-one with your line manager. If you need an attitude change then it’s better you know early enough. If your critics have overstepped their boundaries then by all means get your line manager involved and he/she may decide to take it up with the critcs’ line managers.

Another good approach is to let your work speak for itself. I like to document my activities so that it serves as an easy reference point. You never know when that work will come to your defence and vindicate you. Remember that no man is an island. Always seek opinions of others. Surround yourself with positive people both inside and outside your workplace. Try to emulate the qualities of positive people you see day-to-day. They attract good things. You can be like them too. Carrying old baggage or a chip on your shoulder is not a good way to start a new day that comes with opportunities.

I mentioned earlier that not letting people invade your positive mindset isn’t easy (if only we had a delete button to handle them, right? Ok maybe just a backspace button then). But if we make that choice to have the right attitude, a positive one, then that’s half the button…I mean battle won. I personally ask God to guide my steps and fight my battles for me. With a habit of meditation and prayer you would gradually get the divine direction you need to face life’s critics and challenges.

It won’t all happen overnight. It takes time but the first step takes seconds – make that choice. And so what if the first email you start the following day with goes ‘God morning…’ – at least this time you’re off on the right track ?

Seven degrees of separation


Seven degrees of separation

This post is a self-challenge to combine seven random post titles of other blogs I follow into my post and create a random story. Consequently this post links to other bloggers and is an attempt at closing the separation gap. Enjoy my seven degrees of separation.

When you have a week half as busy as mine, you start thinking of what you can do to unwind. But there is always my trusty liquour cabinet; to be honest there’s no cabinet. I do have a decent collection including whimsical whisky, vociferous vodka and randy rum. They all sit on top of an upper kitchen cabinet just barely within my 6 foot reach. That’s because I was dealing with enough work thoughts clustering my mind. So coping with the brain fog that comes with a certain degree of alcohol consumption wasn’t exciting. Slouched in my comfy rocking chair, in my soporific state I began Continue reading

My birthday weekend

My wife made my birthday special with a collection of thoughtful gifts - I swear it was Christmas

This Hennessy bottle’s journey

My life is extraordinary. Not because I think so. What reminds me of that every time is my glossy glass uniform. My initials ‘X.O’ are in gold inscription. My makers say I’m ‘Extra Old’ but I know I’m also ‘Xtra-Ordinary’. Others associate me with the hug and kiss reserved for the elites who appreciate my uniqueness. The mere middleclass cannot comprehend my worth. You dare not spill me. I can pay the salaries of peasants a hundred fold. You may call it arrogance but Continue reading

I’ll let you in on a secret

Sometimes I wonder what good is a secret if you can’t tell anyone about it? If you’re the custodian of the secret it is tempting to evaluate if you should be divulging information. Valid reasons include to protect an individual, to prevent financial ruin, to maintain status quo, to save lives, etc. Personally, some close contacts have been entrusting me with a good number of secrets (though I’m not yet bursting at the seams). On one hand the sharer of a secret has eased his/her mental burden by telling me about it. On the other, I have now become entrusted with information that suddenly weighs on my mind. While I don’t plan to leak other people’s secrets in this post I do wish to share mine. Continue reading

Facebook, Instagram & WhatsApp are down

I can bet that in the last 3 hours this has been the most popular topic trending the globe. At about 4.22pm today GMT+1 I noticed that my WhatsApp messages were sent but not getting delivered. Like any normal person I thought it might have been that my mobile data had expired or that my home wifi needed a reboot. But I later discovered I wasn’t the only one experiencing connectivity issues. My friend whom I called experienced the same problem on his WhatsApp. I went to Instagram and it was not loading. That’s when I went online and got a better glimpse of the scale of the problem:


Since Facebook, WhatsApp and Instagram were all down I decided to find out what was happening in the news:

Source: CNN

And next I was curious to find out what was trending on Twitter in Nigeria and of course I wasn’t surprised:


Whilst I’m sure that this issue will be resolved (eventually) it does make you wonder what effect this downtime is having on people and businesses. WhatsApp has assured subscribers that the issue is being worked on:

I can imagine people being forced to use other alternatives to chat in the interim; SMS, RCS, MS Teams, etc. My heart goes out to everyone celebrating birthdays today who were looking forward to getting likes, comments and messages. For others, this downtime might mean a chance to finally get up to stretch the legs and go for that long-suppressed wee.

Hopefully this incident will remind us of how dependent we’ve become on technology and for us to ALWAYS have alternatives to EVERYTHING in life so you’re not caught unawares or left in the dark.

Do let me know what your experience has been today not having access to Facebook, Instagram or WhatsApp for a number of hours? I would love to hear from you 🙂

V is for Vaccine

Image credit:

I’ve gone from Covid-19 pandemic to Lockdown to Remote working and I’m wondering how long I will continue to endure this ‘covi-cation’. I’m already accepting the fact that I’ll have to have more virtual meetings, Collabos on Microsoft Teams and video calls for that human touch. I’m not quite ready to meet different people frequently face-to-face. I’m also not quite ready to face taking the vaccine.

From the moment I learnt that a shipment of the AstraZeneca vaccine had arrived in Nigeria I was about as excited as an ex-convict opening his thirteenth letter thanking him for his interest in the job role applied for. Of course what follows includes words like ‘Unfortunately’, ‘better suited’ and ‘wish you the best’.

First of all I have little faith in the capacity of my government to store the vaccine at the prescribed temperature as “Any temperature-controlled drug product that is out of its required temperature will lose its benefits eventually. I pay my taxes and my power bills on time yet I do not have constant power supply. Why should i believe that there is a mega coldroom facility for these vaccines that is powered up 24/7?

Secondly I keep hearing that even after taking the vaccine one can still get the coronavirus. So you’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you don’t. Why then hurry to line up or register for what would not protect me? After all people have gotten better after treatment before the vaccine was ready.

My third concern is that this vaccine is one of two doses required for effectiveness. A study suggested that a 12-week interval would make the second dose more effective. That implies that I’d better set a reminder in my calendar and hope that when the due date is upon me I still have access to the vaccine in it’s supposed 2°C to 8°C state.

What’s the Verdict? Am I voraciously vetting the viability of the vaccine before it’s voyage into my veins? Or am I vying for your vote to validate the ‘vector’ that’s once ventured into vile vermin and vulnerable volunteers? Either way I’m vividly venting with my virtual voice.

The #EndSARS Phenomenon

The last couple of days have been anything but the ‘new normal’ that the Corona pandemic forced us to get accustomed to in Nigeria. We are currently in Day 12 of the #EndSARS protests which was triggered on October 6, 2020 after a civilian was shot and killed by a member of the Special Anit-Roberry Squad (SARS), among other known atrocities committed hitherto (Source: The African Report). The youths of Nigeria have had enough of the police brutality, extortion, abduction and molestation over the years. Promises from the Federal government for a police reform are seemingly no different from those made within the last decade. As at today the demands below have not been fully met:


However there has been a recent update to this agenda which captures the 5-point agenda collectively as one point and goes on to list six others in detail, making it the 7-point agenda.

We are living in unusual times where the youths have had enough of the promises and lack of action by the government parastatals. As far as they are concerned there is no accountable leader running the affairs of Nigeria.

“I bet the government is wishing that the Big Brother Naija Lockdown show was still running at this time to serve as a perfect distraction.”

Ironically, the #EndSARS movement is deliberately without a leader which makes it difficult for the Federal Government to target focus on and ‘deal’ with. I bet the government is wishing that the Big Brother Naija show was still running at this time to serve as a distraction. The youths have been articulate with their demands on behalf of the nation. We await a worthy response from the opposition as we usher in a new Nigeria and possibly birth a new Independence Day.

The prayer is that the fallen angels we lost will not have died in vain…

Source: @NigeriaStories via Twitter

A special thank you to Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey for his support 🙂

This coordination and aid disbursement around the peaceful protests would not have been possible without the help of the devoted Feminist Coalition. Thank you!

The saga continues…

BBNaija Lockdown 2020 Updates: Down to 7

With less than two weeks till the end of the BB Naija Lockdown season the reality show has been nothing short of creative compared to previous seasons. After the unceremonious exit of Billionaire son – Kiddwaya and unlucky HoH arena game contender Prince last weekend the remaining HMs had no idea about the twist to come the following Monday with the arena games.

The usual snake and ladders-inspired game was played with much dexterity by all the HMs because it meant immunity from being nominated for possible eviction. Nengi had luck on her side as she emerged the HoH winner but with no provision to choose a deputy HoH. Then came the twist from Big Brother – unlike previous weeks where HMs would nominate two HMs each, this time around BB divided the losers of the arena games into two groups (Black and White team) and asked each team to nominate two HMs from the opposing team after a 30 minute period. Lovebirds Neo and Vee were different teams but that did not deter them from stylishly saving each other from being nominated in each other’s opposing teams.

After what appeared to be a carefully executed strategy of misdirection by Vee and Neo the final four up for possible eviction are Dora, Ozo, Laycon and Trikytee. Well, I would write more but the show is about to start. See you on the next post 😀

BBNaija Lockdown 2020 Updates: Down to 9

It has been the best of times and the worst of times. After three housemates were evicted two Sundays ago (Tolanibaj, Wathoni and Brighto) tension was on the rise as the remaining housemates tried to cope with the absence of a close companion. But the worst of it came from the HoH for last week (Erica) who had a series of altercations with various housemates and broke several Big Brother rules in the process. She provoked several housemates with insults and also deprived the DHoH of sleeping on the bed in the HoH lounge by pouring water on the bed. Big brother gathered all the HMs and played back the events ahead of Erica’s announcement of her third and final strike leading to her immediate disqualification from the game.

Following Erica’s unceremonious exit with no interview Ebuka, Lucy was announced as the next evictee and she scurried off to the exit door without looking back at the HMs. During her interview with Ebuka she explained that the reason for leaving abruptly was so that she could avoid shedding tears. The HMs seemed quite relieved that Lucy had left but there were mixed feelings about the way Erica left. My unbiased thoughts – she deserved the disqualification. She had 2 previous strikes and a stern final warning yet she went too far with the abuse, goading and complete disregard for her DHoH. Kiddwaya seems to have moved on fairly quickly.

It was all jubilation after the Arena games ended in a five-way tie and then a deciding game resulted in Trikytee becoming the HoH. His surprise deputy choice was Laycon (which made sense because all the other HMs would never have picked him as DHoH if they were picked and had all already been inside the HoH lounge). The warm embrace between the two was the stuff of movies and really tugged at my heartstrings. The other HMs all gave an applause almost as if to affirm that he made a wise choice which they certainly would not have made. Trikytee so far has been the funniest HoH from his poses on the BB throne to the swag with which he reads out BB’s tasks. This will be his first week of being immune from eviction after being up four consecutive times.

This week the four HMs up for eviction are: Kiddwaya, Ozo, Prince and Dorathy. It will be tough determining which of these HMs will be going home this Sunday. If Erica had behaved herself and controlled her alcohol intake perhaps Vee would have been evicted along with Lucy. With the dynamics in play Vee is safe for this week. Nengi isn’t seeming too concerned that Ozo is up for eviction – after all she was only up for eviction last week. Ozo is concerned as it is his first time but Trikytee the veteran assures him that by midweek he will be fine.

With only three weeks left to go before the voting public will have to decide the winner from the last five, it’s going to be interesting to see how HMs behave and interact with each other.

Ships status

  • Kiddrica – Capsized
  • Neve – Adrift
  • Ozone – Still at the dock