…now that I’ve gotten your attention, I’m first going to go into the whole positive spiel about how happily married couples share everything including the toothbrush (eew!) and how they keep absolutely nothing from each other (in case you missed it, I just said the positive bit!). The negative bit I’m about to unleash (Armageddon style) is not for the faint-hearted wives or judgmental/paranoid wives-to-be. If you fall into either category then please close this article now and wait for another publication, otherwise please read on…
Men have secrets, some more than others. When they get married they may choose to share some secrets but where do they draw the line without triggering a marriage meltdown? A husband may want to ‘put a sock in it’ if they woke up one morning and decided to narrate an erotic dream that didn’t involve their wife (even if the woman involved was some impossible-to-get celebrity). That’s just asking for a whole lot of trouble. How about that special female friend whom he’s been in touch with before and after marriage? I don’t think a married man will see sense in disclosing that kind of info, unless of course his wife wasn’t the jealous type (that’s like saying there are dogs that aren’t the barking type!).
On a scarier note, a considerate husband would not disclose any possible regrets for marrying his wife…at least not to the wife. It’s a tough pill to swallow but marriage proposals founded on pity, unplanned pregnancy or financial gain may soon begin to see Frustration rear its ugly head. Next thing you know, the truth is out there like the X-files! Sadly some women just can’t handle the truth; which brings me to the fourth thing husbands won’t tell their wives – how their wives REALLY look. I’m not talking about the diplomatic ‘You like fine, dear’. I mean If she’s having a real ‘off’ day e.g. she’s a little heavy and she’s concerned about her weight, she’s got extremely sensitive skin and she’s concerned about her spots, or perhaps she’s got a freakishly futuristic hairdo she loves but you have a big question mark about, etc.
But it’s not all about the wife, what she looks like or what private relationships or dreams she’s unaware of – there’s also other ‘assets’ to worry about. I heard about joint bank accounts for couples where either can sign to make withdrawals but let’s face it; how many husbands would tell their wives about that private account where their (back-up) funds are kept safe from frivolous spending, possible divorce settlements, etc? You only know what you know, you know 😉
I think the points made here are valid and I wouldn’t tell my husband too 😛
Think it’s only fair you write one about what wives would never tell their husbands.
But how would I know? lol. Feel free to send some pointers my way 😉
I’ll disagree on a lot of things here. Firstly, I told my wife abt all my girlfrieds past. I dnt dream so I’m safe from erotic dreams but I’ll love to meet Eva Mendez and my wife knows this too.
We dnt run a physical joint account but every month I transfer my salary to her minus my tithe and facility repayments.
But u can’t do this with any lady you know, just the special ones like my wife.
Ah, Chyke…all my girlfriends past? I think that highly depends on how many you had – If you had a a few then it’s not as big a blow as having several…more like seven or more, lol. I don’t suppose you want to share what you’d like to do if you met face to face with Eva Mendes. As for the joint account thing, I’m impressed – and you’re right about one thing; you can’t do that with just any lady!
1st kudos to Chyke’s wife…i wish i could gain that kind of trust from my husband but to be honest, i don’t think i’m at that place where i’ll handle the money well just yet.
Now Tonwa, i wonder what inspired this post of yours….hmmmmm
lol @ the regrets bit. It will be really unfair…but can’t help but laugh at the thought of it…
Lol. Funny bro, some things are best not said ?..
Ain’t that the truth bro!
Say what????? LOL!!!! Tonwa see what you’re causing ;-P
In life, marriage, relationships, I’d say total honesty but not full disclosure. Unless your partner is mature enough to handle stuff, I’d say you don’t have to disclose that erotic dream, your partner doesn’t have to know how many ex’s you had (but why you would continue to see your ex secretly after marriage beats me; that’s looking or trouble), etc. The private bank account… money is a touchy subject, I won’t go there…:)
As trust deepens & your love matures, you may consider disclosing more. The downside of full disclosure, especially when you don’t have to, is your partner using the information like nuclear missiles against you… and they nearly always will 🙂
Thanks for this insightful breakdown, livelytwist. I can just imagine the nuclear missiles getting armed and ready, lol. Men with big mouths would probably have a hard time adhering but obviously it’s not just about what the man says; it’s also about how the woman would may or may not react to what is said.
I think if d two party really trust each other there’s nothing u cant tell ur spouse,i mean u can jokingly tell him/her
Well said, Enny *thumbs up*
I want to know y men spend ages in the en- suite bathroom and toilet. I’m talking hours, and they get so obsessed and particular with bathrooms??? Any comment?
Ask dad, LOL!
The problem is there would always be secrets to keep..
…and that goes for both parties 🙂
Pingback: How to make a Chapman drink | The Crazy Nigerian